I'm fucking awesome, that's all you need to know.
Now be a good boy and follow me!!!

"I took her out to McDonalds and we had two shakes,” he said when we asked if they did anything to build their relationship. After expressing our own shock that they didn’t just order one shake with two straws, he added, “We didn’t do that – we thought that was too cliché.”

(Source: beatricedivergence)

Sheo at San Diego Comic Con (6/18/13) vs. L.A. Divergent Worldwide Premiere (4/18/14)

(Source: bearticeprior)

What’s interesting about good and moral people is that they actually have to try and function in a word that isn’t. And the older you get, the more interesting that becomes. Because it’s also the hardest thing to do in the world. (x) (x)

(Source: lockelamoras, via captamerican)

Anonymous asked: What's it like being an adult


Answer:

stupidstagram:

"should i buy a news paper? i have the cnn app? does that count? should i buy a coffee maker? it will probably save me a lot of money? but then i have to buy coffee beans? i dont know shit about coffee beans! should i act like i’m reading this bottle of wine for a few minutes before i head straight to the discount vodka section? should i go to the supermarket and buy broccoli? i fucking hate broccoli did i just get invited to a fucking dinner party .. …what do you bring to a dinner party???? TAX SEASON SHOTS FOR EVERYONE! wakes up staring at a ceiling that is not my own ..did i just burn toast? how did i make it this far in life without fucking DYIGN i’m so DUMB and sTUPD and i cant do anyhtign  right.. yeah hey mom yeah i’m fine how are you" 

"You and I remember budapest very differently."

(via captamerican)

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

a fun thing to do: say “no thanks, i’m a vegetarian” when people hand you their newborn babies

(via captamerican)